Something that I’m loathe to admit to strangers, mostly because they’ll scoff and make fun of me, is that I have psychic and lucid, though not always at the same time, dreams.
Sunday night, I dreamed of being back in my parents’ home. It was tricked out exactly as it had been when I graduated from high school 18 years ago. All I remember clearly is I talked with Mom (who looked as she did when she was in her fifties) as we walked across the living room to the new (in 1989) couch. The words we spoke I don’t know, but the feelings were that of reassurance, comfort and Dad’s death. We sat on the couch and my conscious prodded that Mom has been dead for over 4 months, which twigged that this was a visitation.
When I woke up Monday morning, I knew that Mom had visited me for a reason. I’ve been having a lot of troubles currently and there have been times I wished I could talk to her for that mother-daughter comfort.
I began my day normally. On my gaming forum, I was typing in a reply message when I got an eerily familiar feeling of deja vu. I believe it was the ad at the bottom of the page that twigged it for me; I’d dreamed I’d done this and now I have. The omen that I’ve set something unstoppable and unalterable in motion hung over me for several hours until I began crying. Empath hugged me and I finally told him what was bothering me. It cleared in my mind that I was leaving the last messages to people before I served my prison term for unpaid child support.
This happened again. I was typing up a post on one of my other blogs and that creepy deja vu sense clouded my mind.
I have court Wednesday (tomorrow) and I am totally frightened now. I’m doing my best to alter my routine; to change the outcome because I know that some things are not set in stone.
I may clean house. It will get me away from the computer for a few hours and possibly throw a wrench in the works.
